random... thing... like... you know...

[confliction]

man this entry is gonna suck ass

- - - - - - - -

revolutions rocked, and man oh man...
...oh man...
...the thing...
...with the things...
...it's so cool!

Trying not to spoil it, lol.

Just think... Dragon Ball Z... hehe.

- - - - - - - -

*sigh*

- - - - - - - -

i get so much out of movies and art and stuff...
...music especially...

but i feel so low right now

something happened which really brought it home for me
by societies standards i'm really not cut out for social crap

i just don't think like most people...
...i hate nightclubs...
...i think if people put more time into finding their partner
and making sure they are who they say they are
and that they get along
then people would be a lot less stressed about relationships.

basically, i could of pulled or some shit like that last night
but i wasn't having any of it
it's not how i work, and its not how i want to work

dumb fucking societal 'norms'

she claimed it was a friendly chat anyway
i was sittin on my own in this club night that my housemate runs

anyways...

i hate people judging me by their standards
especially when society has no fucking standards.

this entry is sad

as in, what the hell am i on about

- - - - - - - -

i feel alone

forever

eternally

future

past

and present...

i feel alone

some know me better than others

but you all have your doubts

and that's the issue really...
like...
philosophically, we can't know anyone...
...i guess everyone fears it...
...it's the human condition...
...to not be understood.

Ignorance might be bliss,
but it's a price i can't afford.

The wool's not being pulled over my eyes,
i don't want to join the flock.

I'll just suffer in existential despair instead...

...and fight the hordes of the blind who don't understand the Matrix movies.

- - - - - - - -

what can i do?

take it a day at a time...?

I'm going to Paris soon, that will keep me occupied for a while.

Long story as to why i'm going...
...and you probably wouldn't believe me anyway.
I mean... you'll accept the story...
...you'll just judge my motives on your own terms.

- - - - - - - -

Space is a lonely place.
and inside my head ain't any better.

Comments

[greenhayze.livejournal.com]

Well, I feel for you on the lonliness thing but did you ever think that maybe not being understood is partly your own doing? I dont mean that to you personally, aimed at all people including myself. Dont think its a good idea to elabourate here but shall explain later. Anyway, yes, everyone craves to be understood which is why people spend so much time talking over one another.
As for what you were saying about relationships; well, buddhism says the one infallible way to have a good relationship with a partner is to accept every facet of them without reservation. Which if you think about it is bloody hard to do but there you go.

And on a last point, I came, I saw the Matrix. Or should I say, I saw, I came. Twas great. I just pray to the god I dont believe in that the wackowskis have the good taste to leave it as a neat trilogy and not do any epilogues or prequels or any of that bullshit. Its so nicely rounded off it would be a crying shame.

-Caz

P.S. FFX-2 out soon! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!!!