"paradise found is paradise lost"

[confliction]

you're an idiot if you don't take every chance you're given
if they don't pick you, they'll pick someone else

i'm a fucking idiot.

- - - - - - - -

i'm scared.

- - - - - - - -

i'm alone.

- - - - - - - -

i have no idea what i'm doing.

- - - - - - - -

and yet i still keep breathing...
...still keep weeping

over this life.

- - - - - - - -

i may feel like the entire race is...
...immature...
...adolescent...
...retarded...
...young.

there are times when i'm the young...
...the very young.

like the child i am,
i will live and learn.

- - - - - - - -

i hope humanity wakes up,
and does the same.

- - - - - - - -

(this is not a list in order of importance)

her name was Eleanor...
her name was Rebecca...
her name was Lisa...
her name was Carly...
her name was Kim...
her name was Caroline...
her name was Lindsy...
her name was Katie...
her name was Suzy...
her name was Carmen...
her name was Chloe...
her name was Corrine...
her name was Lorna...
her name was Nicola...
her name is ...

where does it end?

- - - - - - - -

Finch - Ender (lyrics)

Here I am beside myself again
I'm torn apart by words that you have said
All in all, I know we're falling apart
Where did you run to so far away?

Here we are to sing you a song
There you are asleep against the window pane
Just like always

You said you like to hear the rain sometimes
All I can do is tell you the truth
And oh, my eyes will tell you the same

Here we are to sing you a song
There you are asleep again

Grasp our hands together, we feel we are one result

Comments

[popsickle.livejournal.com]

Hey Jaymee, how are ya? Well i guess thats a dumb ass question, why are you so sad??? I really hope you feel better! I saw my name, i hope it's not having bad connotations or anything, i am sorry if i have hurt you ever! I know i've sucked a s a friend lately, *shrug* i dunno, life does suck alot, most of the time. I agree with your ideals of humanity and it's immaturity, gah i hate poeple mostly. Lol sorry, i hope you feel better! <3333

[confliction.livejournal.com]

i'm alright generally i guess, bit stressed due to moving, but all's good in life generally.
i'm sad and kicking the crap out of myself emotionally and mentally, because i'm so lame... lol.
don't worry, it's not a bad connotation, it's a good one, in a way ;)
it's a list of all the girls that have, to a greater or lesser extent, had a massive impact on my learning experiences of socializing with girls... if that makes any sense?
glad you agree humanity is immature...
...it's a shame i am in some respects too.
but i'll learn from my mistakes
it just seems that i'm teaching myself by beating myself up about it... full of regret...
...meh.
hope things are cool with yourself, you finish work in the near future! :)
then off to Uni, which should rock =)
take care gal, xxJJxx